Why does my narcissistic ex told me that he f*cked and sleep with other woman and then at the end says that it also happened because of me?

we met a person we wanted to share a life with and sadly they are incapable of giving you that simple joy.

The true story for me encapsulated all angles from the preditor to how they come into your life as these (masked) persons as your everything and when its over you realize they are con men/women… they can be dangerous on levels you cannot imagine and how underestimating them by blowing past the red flags will leave you feeling victimized, exploited and at a loss how it went so far off the rails.

they will never give you answers and the full closure you need. You may slip off your cracker trying to make sense of it all but do not go back to them for closure.

I have been married for 34 years, and I found out my wife lied, and cheated a lot back before we got married. Does she not change, or is it possible she is still a cheater?

sometimes just loving a narcissist is reason enough for them to devalue you

they robbed you of time and energy youll never get back but do not blame yourself or allow him to place his bad behaviours on your shoulders.

so when you uncover their true selves the cognitive dissonance is jarring. How can a person who says they love you be the very embodiment of a dc comics super villain?

My stepmother has banned me from the family. Can she legally keep me from going to my father's funeral?

please get tested for std’s.

drugs, porn, sex, gambling, dating sites, various aliases, various emails, various facebook profiles, fighting, chaos, drama, endless hook ups, stds, hidden familes or side relationships, phoney resumes, sunstance abuse, mind games … all of this is part and parcel of how they operate.

you cant fix or heal them

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im sorry you had to learn like me/us that Monsters we were taught, hide in the dark and under our beds. However

thats why i always tell folks i contribute my writings and answer questions to , i advise them to watch dirty john based on a true story.

you get to see cluster b bullshittery in its reality. How a victim is groomed. How it affects family, how it destroys your trust, how sixk they can be, the lies and how they take a torch to everything around them.

Undercover cops in New York are riding the subways with iPods on to entice robbery. Is that a form of entrapment? If not, why not?

the longer you pair with them …. The more damage they do and they only get worse as they age. Notice i used the word pair and not relationship? I truly believe you cannot have a relationship with a cluster b.

hurt people hurt people

and really learn to be gentle with yourself

Is there a type of function where every point has exactly one tangent line passing through it? If yes, what is this type of function called?

they have a disorder

the truth is they will never be the person you wish they could or should be.

they are like a glass of champagne but after an amount of time they really are a warm beer with a cigarette butt floating in it.

Hello,hope y'all doin good, i came to Quora to share my strange story , a very weird one , a story when luck smiled at me ,maybe u will enjoy it , let's begin,have fun... A year ago ,I was a real porn addicted(btw I was 18) ,but never had sex before, I don't have a gf I didn't try to find one even ,always thinking to go to find a sex worker but then I just don't , everyday watching different bodies getting fucked and everyday enjoying. One day, I was watching porn, a big ass lady with big boobs ,just after seeing her the image of my female cousin poped in my mind, (let's introduce her : she's 35 years old , very big ass , nice boobs ,not very big but nice,always wearing tight clothes , she's divorced ) and I thought of me fucking her ,I never had sexual desires for her but now I do days went by and when I met her I was so horny ,I couldn't stay with the family cz my penis was clearly erected , I realized this is my first time I get horny for one of my family ,it not illegal in my country.well to make a long story short( if u want details just text me I will tell u 😊),I decided to give her signs that I want to fuck her,finally I decided to have sex and with my cousin , I thought it is the best beggining for me, i started touching her when I came across her in a narrow place , make her feel my hard cock when we hug , I thought it will hard and I will be ashamed but no , I felt nothing and she said nothing , probably she thought it was by mistake,anyways, I decided then to talk with her about sex, waited for her to be alone in a room and talk with her, I confessed everything about me watching porn and addicted..etc,she said it's normal and u are growing up and u must have sex,well at that time I was like whaaat????? Well I didn't control myself and asked her for sex ( horny like I Ve never been before) she said that she will think Abt it ,2 weeka went by then she called me ,telling that she reserved a room in a hotel and we meet tonight ,we met,and bruuhh, sex is great , I mean, I had to find a pirstitue ,what I was waiting for to have such a feeling ????, I will never forget that night, I started kissing her she was kissing hard ,she misses sex so bad , she sucked my dick and swallowed my semen ,I felt I'm in a dream , then when fucked ,her ass was very big and the anus was open ,didn't struggle to get my hard cock inside it , she was obviously missing sex , she was shouting ,fuck me yh fuck me , I go fast after every word until I cum , we did that 3 times , then we went to her pussy , using condoms I fucked her so hard the moans were higher , everything was perfect ,in the end I asked her to lick her body , licked pussy ,ass, boobs,then she sucked my cock until we sleeped ,all I know that she was dirty ,well before even having sex with her I knew she is an open minded woman , and a woman that looks that she donesnt know anything , but she knows everything, but never expected having sex with her ,well she was horny and that helped...but no one of us regretted that sex ever.. We still have sex from time to time ,and I started having sex with sex workers , joining threesomes..etc If u want pics of her text me.

not to any of us. We recieved the dine n dash or hit n run and we are left picking up the pieces.

Why?

go no contact. Do bot leave a crack open for them. IF he is your ex , their is a reason for that. Do not throw your pearls to a pig. You cannot allow this person near your mind or heart again no matter what he says or how you may have doubts you may feel lonely, confused. Want closure. Trust me on this

Should parents force their kids to go to school when they are sick?

since all pwnpd are on a scale, according to where they are on the scale , the higher up or the stronger their traits they are capable of not only hurtful but criminal behaviour

All narsholes control, lust, own, and ultimately they get by in life satisting their one sided selfish desires. They operate in an alternate reality where life owes them, they feel entitled to quick fixes and if its at your expense or anyone elses due to their lack of empathy and impulse control - they cannot bond and are only myopically seeing life as something to exploit

dont blame yourself or allow the narc to blame you for their bad behaviour. Their is nothing you did that made them act like this. They were broken and mesed up long before you met them. And they will go to their graves repeating clusters of toxic patterns and traits that make up their dna.

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its never easy to wrap your head around it because its not normal. Its not how you live. Its not how you love. Its not even how you would treat your toaster.

i want you to research trauma bonds

but you have all of that and more!

What have you learned from your parents' mistakes?

You discovered the hard way that you actually invited a monster into your bed.

they do not bond. The pairing is the result of entering into the game where the narshole has the play book, they make the rules and they always win. Its never really about your wants and needs - its about how they can get what they want and when they want it. Regardless of consequences

life has no checks and balances no guard rails, no morals, ethics, no principles for them

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concentrate and focus on your spiritual, emotional, mental and physical wellness now.

their is no amount of couples therapy, prayer, or medication , group or 1–1 therapy that is going to turn the bus around. That ship has sailed and all you can do now is go no contact and begin your healing journey. Learn about hoovering and do what you have to do to to keep yourself safe

here is the truth. You paired with a person who wants to hurt you. He is broken and they use sex as a weapon. Sometimes they withhold sex, to punish you or they will cheat and rub it in your face. Either way they are placing and projecting their brokeness and pain and all their shame on to you

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they have maladaptive coping mechanisms and these were established long before you came on to the scene

but here is some more truth

the good news is you can move past this and hopefully educate yourself so that it doesnt happen to you again.

Is it true that all men want a woman who looks like an Instagram “model”?

so im sorry you paired with a broken man. Im sorry he failed you. Im sorry he hurt you,

now a true narc cannot handle the truth, they cant handle accountability or culpability. They project and blame shift. They thrust from a core of shame and brokeness. So hurting you is part of their pathology. They once idealized you and now they love to hate you. Does not make sense does it?

sadly you were manipulated and abused by the sounds of it by a very sick and sadistic person. These cluster b types - not only play with your mind but they can leave you in shambles in so many ways

Are you happy with your life?

Im very sorry for this experience. You are not alone. It is imperative you find a good therapist.

if you go back for another round itll only be worse then the first